Qualities awakened through Love

Destruction of the ego. Another name for love is continuous remembrance. By remembering the Beloved continuously, attachment and love for Him are awakened within and the ego or self is destroyed. The lover then begins to merge into the Beloved to the extent that he becomes His very form.

Bulleh Shah says:

I have been crying ‘Ranja, Ranja, my beloved’ so much that I have become Ranja.

To forget one’s self is the fundamental principle of love. All the desires of a lover narrow down to the will of the Beloved. His whole self is dissolved into the Beloved. When there is no self, then where are the desires? Even God is in search of such true lovers. Our ego is an obstacle between us and God.

So long as thou art, how can thy Beloved be thine?


He further states:

When you have emptied yourself by constant remembrance, you will find the path which leads to the Prescience of the Lord.

Maulana Rumi says in this direction:

When there is no „I“ in you, then your God will have communion with you. Therefore, you should try to forget yourself.

A lover destroys his ego and thus loosens the ties of worldly attachment. Then the love which is between the lover and the Lord is born and he meets the Lord. Such love destroys all our selfish desires an makes the soul worthy of flying to the spiritual regions above. It is true that a person who has his body and his bodily energies under control also has control over higher regions. Love is a certain remedy for all our ailments. That person is really fortunate who, by sacrificing himself, effaces his ego and thus is in intimate communion with God. Without destruction of one’s ego, it is not possible to have the Darshan of the Lord. If you wish to purchase Him, sell yourself.

Love only gives, and takes nothing. Love is such a unique quality that whosoever gets it has no other desire left in him. Love makes man selfless and free from all care. In love, there is never any question of taking, because it knows only how to give. We love children and continue giving them things. We never desire anything from them, and they are a source of happiness to us.

The foundation of love is to give. Wherever there is love, there will be only the feeling to give, and the desire to receive anything will never be formed. Love is selfless. It is not selfish. Even in the love of God, the feeling of giving or surrendering ourselves to Him is the first step. In the beginning we may pray to God for the necessities of life, but this state is prior to the development of love for God.

Generally, people worship God with some ulterior motive, and they ask for worldly blessings. They pray that their children may be healthy, and they ask for the joys of heaven. Such people are either lovers of the world or the comforts of heaven. Only a rare few worship God for the sake of God alone. Our aim should be to remember God only out of love for Him. We should not blacken our heart by worldly desires, and should ask from Him nothing but love for Him.

To ask from you, o my Lord! anything other than You, is to seek trouble. Give me patience by your Naam, so that all hunger of the mind may disappear.

With the appearance of love, our ego is consumed in the will of God. Demands automatically cease and we are happy only in accepting the will of the Beloved. A devotee considers it a sin to demand anything from God.

When we love somebody, what do we do? We sacrifice everything – our heart, our life, our body, etc. Whatever pleases the one whom we love also pleases us. Have we fallen so low that while trying to love Him we should also demand from Him the fulfilment of our desires? When we do this, have we any right to call ourselves lovers of God? We are not His lovers, but the lovers of His gifts.

Maulana Rumi

Then, how can one meet God? Only he will meet Him who has sacrificed himself for Him, who is constantly and selflessly engaged in Naam (Shabd, Word or Sound Current) - whether sitting, sleeping, awake, walking, etc. Such a Man is of God, and God is His.

Those who demand things of the world from Him will get their worldly desires fulfilled, but these will not meet God. He knows all our thoughts, so how can we deceive Him? He knows even the latent desires in our mind, and whatever we ask God for, He gives. 

The fifth Sikh Guru says:

My kind Lord has permitted me to know that His children will be given whatever they desire. You should therefore become His children and ask only for His Darshan so that His Lotus Feet may reside in your heart.

A Master is the manifestation of God. A lover of a Master does not even demand salvation or Sat Naam. His love is for the sake of love and he gets everything without asking for it.

A wife loves her husband and because of that love he tries to satisfy her needs without her having to ask him. Similarly, a Master, who is the manifestation of God Himself, gives everything to us. He gives us whatever we need, without our asking. Above all, He bestows the highest treasure of love through which peace, concentration, blissful life and inner awakening are produced. The lover’s devotion is for Him alone, and in the eyes of a true devotee both the worlds appear to be nothing.

Love is selfless. True love is free from all desires. Selfishness and love cannot meet. Love decreases in proportion to the degree of increase of selfishness; and love increases as selfishness decreases.

Leaving aside spirituality, it is not good to have a feeling of selfishness even in the ordinary day-to-day life. If we love someone with any selfish aim, then it is not love; rather, we love our own selfish ends. Similarly, those who worship with a desire for wealth, offspring, fame or heaven are not real devotees. That kind of love is more like a trade or a business. True love is only for the love of the Beloved. 

Sheik Farid says:

Where there is greed there is no love, and if greed is there, that love is false.

Every soul is love in its very essence, but if this love is confined to a certain state and is directed in the form of a desire then the soul energy is stopped. When a person gives up all desires, his soul-currents of love emanate with great force. The fullness of live is a state of desireless.

A yogi desires salvation, but a lover or a devotee does not want this and is happy only in the pure love of the Lord. The root of all evils, namely selfishness, is the basis of all evil acts by anyone towards another. But a devotee of the Lord is absorbed only in Him, selflessly. It is impossible for any idea of evil to be entertained by such a person.

Love brings fearlessness and courage of a high order. The first sign of true love is that the lover becomes free from fear. A lover is happy only when he sacrifices his heart and his life. When one is pierced with love, how can he be afraid of death? The Master acts as a shield for him, so how can the arrows of death pierce him? Such a lover has no fear of anybody except the Beloved.

Even a delicate woman will be prepared to attack a tiger, if she sees her children in danger. How can one be afraid of anything, if he has dedicated his life to love? Where there is fear, love has not yet affected the heart. The first stage of love is fearlessness. 

Kabir says:

Oh Kabir! Only those will be able to drink from the still well of love who will be prepared to sacrifice their heads. No one else will be eligible to drink. Oh Kabir! The cup of love is full of flavour, but to drink it is very difficult because the One who distributes this wine demands the sacrifice of your head.

The courage of a lover is also of a high order. People generally get tired when they work, but the hands and the feet of a lover are given a unique strength and activity. He does not remain idle. His heart assumes greatness of an ocean. He has no worries. For him even impossible things become possible. Every difficult thing becomes easy. 

Guru Arjan says:

If the path of love is beset with oceans, mountains, forests and endless deserts – all these appear to be equal to only one step forward on account of love.

A lover does not worry about obstacles in his path. Farid says:

The home of the Beloved is far off. The road which leads to it is felled with mire on account of rain, but the lover has only the thought of the Beloved in his heart. When he walks on such a road his clothes become wet and he even slips at every step on account of the mud. But he does not care and goes forward somehow. He does not want to break the continuity of its love. Then he cries out, ‘Oh God! This rain should be a torrential rain and this blanket of mine should be drenched.’ With these words he goes on to meet his Beloved so that his love may not wane.

Love has a force which imparts increased power of endurance to the lover and makes him capable of enduring pain. Lovers who have been madly in love have actually made friends with death. They feel a sense of pleasure in facing troubles, and they may fight all their life against hope but they never waver.

The world of lovers is not easy. Bilwamangal was able to ford a river on a dead body, thinking it to be a log of wood, because he was intoxicated with love. He even climbed the roof of his Beloved’s house by means of a hanging snake, mistaking it to be a piece of rope. The darkness of the night, the torrential rain and the fearful tempest, all faded away before the whirlwind of Bilwamangal’s madness of love. Manu’s love was similarly expressed for Laila. Farhad was the lover of Shirin. They danced attendance from door to door; they fell against stones and had to climb mountains. They even starved for lack of food, but nothing could deter them form their live, till death overtook them. These are examples of the ventures of physical love.

Love is a force greater than any other. Love is energy, which gives power to life.

The Upanishad says:

Those who practise Pranayam, crush their enemies into small bits like a clod of earth when struck against a stone.

A lover achieves strength to bear all kinds of troubles and tortures. People of the world are unable to bear slander but a lover becomes indifferent to it. His soul receives such strength that he does not succumb to any ailment. Love is a perfect remedy for all inner ailments.

Love comprises service, sacrifice and true subjugation of mind. A mother moves around the bed of her sick child with such devotion that she has no idea of day or night, but she does not complain about her own inconvenience. A child wets the bed but the mother puts the child on the dry side and herself sleeps on the wet side the whole night. She never entertains a feeling of anger or hatred in her mind for the child. A mother may have been hungry for a number of days; she has a little food which she gives to her child, and herself quietly lies down and suffers from starvation. She never complains. She is patient and thankful.

This is the gift of self-sacrifice and subjugation of the mind, which are the sequence of love. People try to control passion, anger, greed, attachment and pride. That is not an easy job, but through true love they are all completely toned down. We bow before such love.

All things become easy in the presence of love. A person under the influence of love performs the most difficult tasks with comparative ease. Through love, even impossible things become possible. Love knows no burdens. You may have to work very hard. There may be a great burden of responsibilities on your shoulders. But if you clearly understand the law of love, all these difficulties will be performed by live without trouble. „He does much who loves much.“

If a person loves a certain type of work, he works at it incessantly because love feels no burden. A lover does not mind burdens and he therefore gladly accomplishes work beyond his capacity. He never complains of his inability to do any work because he considers himself capable of doing every type of work in the atmosphere of his love. Love gives him such energy that he does not consider anything impossible.

A lover pays no heed to public opinion or his own high position. In true love all such feelings vanish. The idea of high or low birth also disappears. One who is in love has no connection with such things.

If you are a lover of the Divine Beauty, you should rise above criticism. One who is fully dyed in the colour of love is unconcerned about all public gossip and opinions.

Hafiz says:

We do not care for public opinion, nor praise.

Whosoever has dedicated his honour at the feet of the Lord will be protected by God Himself. Such devotees are always intoxicated with love and are free from anxiety. 

Kabir says:

A person who wishes to taste love and also wants to maintain his fame or honour should know that these two things cannot stay together; just as two swords cannot be contained in one scabbard. I have not seen such a thing nor have I ever heard of it.

Love brings to the lover the quality of concealing the bad qualities of others. Love hides all evils and bad things. In a lover’s eyes the beloved appears to be pure and free from all evils. He sees the spark of his beloved in everybody. Therefore he talks sweetly to the liking of all. His attention never turns towards the faults or defects of anyone in this world. Why should he then criticize or talk ill of anyone? Criticism is the Outcome of the Absence of Love.

Lovers are awakened through love, and love’s power remains constant. One whose mind has become alive through love is beyond death, and memory of his name lives forever.

There are many other attributes of love. By obtaining or developing love, many virtues are added. „Love and all things shall be added unto you.“ In love there is unique oneness, happiness, comfort and fulfilment. Through love, one is able to benefit his own self and also his family.

When the mind is filled with love, the ego is destroyed; fear, worry and transmigration of the soul are ended; all mental anguish, all pains and ailments are finished. Illusion (Maya), bad acts and evil intellect are also effaced. Desire, restlessness and all the mind’s dirt are removed. All longings are fulfilled and devotion is produced. Such a devotee crosses the ocean of life and attains salvation. He is honoured and receives honour in the Presence of the Lord. He achieves the state of Sahaj [Transition from the state of „becoming“ to that of „being“ one with the Supreme Lord; hence a state of supreme bliss.]. Because of the love within himself, God is always his guide. He meets God, and God resides in his heart. The mind becomes satisfied. He goes to his Real Home, and is freed from the cycle of births and deaths.

Love has been described and given a high place in the Sikh Scriptures, and there are numerous verses invoking the spirit of love within. It is suggested that the reader should read them carefully, and by imbibing such love make his life fruitful.